Celebrity Jokes
Question:
Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with
his five wives?
Answer: Because every time he spreads
their legs he sees Bush.
Question:
How can you tell if Michael Jackson has company?
Answer: There's a big wheel parked
outside his house
Question:
What's Bill Clinton's idea of safe sex?
Answer: When Hillary is out of
town.
Question:
What's white and sticky and found on the
bathroom wall?
Answer: George Michael's latest
release.
Question:
What did Saddam say when he came out of his hole?
Answer: Did I beat David Blaine?
Due
to a mixup on Grammy night, Madonna, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera
are forced to share a private jet in order to arrive in time for the ceremony.
Once up in the air, Madonna pulls out a $1000 bill and says "I’m
going to throw this $1000 bill out the window and make someone down below
very happy."
Not to be outdone, Britney ripped $1000 bill in half and threw it out
the window, saying, "Look, I just made two people really happy."
Not even noticing Britney’s stupid move, Christina bragged, "Look, I’m going to throw 1000 $1 bills and make a lot more people a little happier."
At this point the pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can’t stand it anymore, comes out and says, "I think I’ll throw all three of you out of this plane and make 250 million people happy."
A man walks into a store to buy a Barbie doll for his daughter. "How much is that Barbie in the window?", he asks the shop assistant.
In a manner she responds, "Which Barbie? We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $395.00. "
The guy asks, "Why is Divorced Barbie different from all the others ?
"That’s obvious," the assistant states, "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken’s house, Ken’s car, Ken’s boat, Ken’s furniture... "
What
does Hannibal Lecter call Britney Spears?
Dinner at Hooters.
Do you know how we can get Osama bin Laden? Lace a bunch of Watchtower magazines with anthrax and send the Jehovah Witnesses in after him. Those people can find anybody!
One night Shaina Twain, Shaggy, and Britney Spears all went to the movies,
all of a sudden some one farted ... :o Shainia said: "Up up up, theres
no way, but up from here." Shaggy said: "Wasn't me." Britney
said: "Oops I did it again." The next night they went to the
movies again and once again someone farted ... : Shainia said: "Up
up up, theres no way, but up from here." Shaggy said: "Wasn't
me." Britney said: "Stronger than yesterday" Shaggy later
left to go to the washroom and Britney entered the male washroom as he
did. He then turned around and asked what she was doing in the males washroom
and she said: "I'm not a girl not yet a woman"
What have Posh Spice and Man Utd
got in common?
They both play with Beckham.
Arnie's Back.......
